Guide to Selecting the Best March Madness Cinderella
Every March, at least one lower-seeded (7-16) team makes a fairy-tale-like run in the NCAA basketball tournament as they unexpectedly break the hearts of teams with championship expectations. We call these teams Cinderellas. For those filling out their bracket at home, the toughest aspect required to win their pool between friends and coworkers isn’t predicting who will ultimately end up becoming the champion, but determining which of the underdogs will make this unforgettable run and bust the majority of brackets. The key to easily prognosticating this year’s Cinderella isn’t with analytics or staying up to date on a slew of injury reports; all you need to do is examine a team’s nickname. Cinderella teams empowered by their distinctive nicknames have been known to pull off upsets consistently over the years. In the last decade alone, teams called the Ramblers, Retrievers, Beavers, and Peacocks have all flipped the sports world upside down with seismic upsets on their paths to being immortalized in the history of college basketball. So, what makes a memorable nickname for a potential giant slayer? I utilize the three following factors:
Uniqueness: I appreciate a team who doesn’t use the same mascot as three other teams in their own conference. Although, it’s even better in my opinion when that team has a mascot that evokes a vocal reaction of “What the hell is a…” and forces me look up its meaning. I also admire a team that uses a nickname that relates to their university’s location or region.
Staying Power: Will I randomly remember it years later when that specific university’s name comes up? For example, one time at work, a coworker mentioned they graduated from the University of Vermont. I quickly responded, “Ah, the Catamounts!” and got into a discussion about how I knew that.
Subjective Personal Preference: Obviously, dogs and animals will do better, but some animals are both more equal and better than others. Unfortunately, the Great Danes of Albany, the Terriers of Wofford, and the Salukis of Southern Illinois will not be dancing this year. I’m also disappointed over the fact that none of the whimsically-nicknamed University of California system schools like the Anteaters of UC Irvine, Tritons of UC San Diego, the Gauchos of UC Santa Barbara, or the Banana Slugs of UC Santa Cruz will have the opportunity to knock off a top-rated team in this year’s tournament.
Top 2026 Cinderella Teams
Akron Zips
Formerly known as the Zippers, Akron apparently picked their original name as an homage to a popular rubber boot manufactured locally by the B.F. Goodrich Corporation that featured the nifty addition of a zipper. I always thought it was a reference to speed and their players zipping by their opponents, but I think these boot-loving boys have what it takes to squeak past their foes to pull off multiple upsets in the coming weeks.
Penn Quakers
Do they have a fun nickname? No! Did Ev Dog attend grad school there, and does he now have his first opportunity to watch them compete in the tournament this year? Yes! Plus, although they aren’t flashy, pacifism and oatmeal both provide the fundamentals and discipline required to secure the occasional upset.
Saint Louis Billikens
What the hell is a Billiken? This inquisitive reaction personifies exactly what one must search and ask for in the ideal Cinderella team nickname. It features both the characteristics of uniqueness and staying power. Now, I understand that some may prefer something less creepy than an impish troll baby that one purchases for good luck. However, in March, we need all the luck we can get, so go buy one and rub its Billiken belly now!
16-Seeded Good Boys: Siena Saints & University of Maryland Baltimore County Retrievers
Ignore the fact that 16-seeds have only ever won 2 games in the history of tournament and support the pups!
Siena is the ultimate nickname redemption by changing from the controversial and bland Indians to the alliteration-friendly and distinctive Saints. While I wish they would have included the Bernards in their name, I understand the need for nickname flow and efficiency in our fast-moving world. At least they included it on their logo with a big boy who has enough of that Beethoven-chaotic energy in his underdog eyes to get the job done, save his family, and increase the school’s athletic budget by 10%!
UMBC has done it once already, so why not shock the world again! Cinderellas need to be both blue collar and contain the ability to splash some threes. Who can exude both those qualities more than a Chesapeake Bay Retriever? I rest my case.
*UPDATE: If Mike Pence or whatever nefarious schmuck runs the NCAA these days has the courage to change the result of the Howard-UMBC play-in game, the Retrievers are still a great choice as a Cinderella!
Now for some teams to avoid…
DO NOT PICK THESE TEAMS WITH UNCREATIVE NICKNAMES
Villanova Wildcats
Of all the super common college nicknames like Eagles, Hawks, and Tigers, I despise no trite nickname more than the Wildcat. It’s such an ambiguous name for an animal already and it’s called five different things around the nation. Troy Bolton and the East High Wildcats (Everywhere! Wave your hands up in the air!) from High School Musical is the only team that should have that nickname. Being in the Philly area, there’s so many better options available for Nova like the Hoagie Men.
Georgia Bulldogs
This pick may surprise people as it’s a dog, but I loathe the ostentatious attempt by UGA to pretend to be Yale with their hackneyed Bulldog nickname. Their live mascot, Uga, is a good boy, but I think something more representative of the state’s history like the peachy pit bulls would have been a more suitable choice.
Hofstra Pride
We here at Ev Dog support those who celebrate their pride for who they are, but we remain disappointed with teams who use it as their nickname for a group of lions after previously being known as the Flying Dutchmen. A flawless nickname for a college in Long Island that meets both the unique and rare historical qualifications. We will never forget.
